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> JULY 2002 July
30, 2002
July
28, 2002
Get packing, Terry. See you in baseball hell. July
27, 2002
July
24, 2002
July
23, 2002
July
22, 2002
No reason to worry, however, when Dan Evans is in charge. Apparently hearing our recent demand that he pick up the phone and start making some deals, Evans acquired 29-year-old utilityloser Jolbert Cabrera from Cleveland. Sure, since the Dave Roberts thing has worked out, let's just pick up all of Cleveland's excrement. His latest fecal pick-up really stinks, though: Jolbert is batting .111. July
21, 2002
July
20, 2002
On Friday night against San Francisco, it got pretty sad. With the score tied 2-2 in the 11th, Eric Karros led off with a triple—one of the funniest things in baseball to watch. Not funny, however, when the Dodgers blow the opportunity. Then, as it always seems to happen, a former Dodger burned them. Tom Goodwin—PIECE OF CRAP TOM GOODWIN—singled home the go-ahead run for the Giants in the 12th, and they hung on to win, 3-2. With Friday's loss, the Dodgers are in 3rd place. Look out Colorado, here we come. July
10, 2002
DB
will be updated again on July 21st. Until then, may all the Dodger
starters go eight, and may Eric Gagne's hat not be confiscated by
the Center for Disease Control. July
7, 2002
So at the break, the West looks like this: Dodgers lead Arizona by 2.5 and San Francisco by 4.5. Can the Dodgers keep it up? Well, it'll make this web site a hell of a lot more legitimate if they don't. July
4, 2002
Lead over Arizona: a game and a half. July
3, 2002
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Kazuhisa
Ishii had nothing on Tuesday night. Barely able to find the strike
zone, he was hit hard the few times he did actually throw a strike.
More disappointing than his outing, however, was the fact that Jim
Tracy didn't pull him out of the game until he had allowed EIGHT
runs. Check that, it's not disappointing— it's totally fuckin'
inexcusable. From his first pitch it was obvious Ishii had crappy
stuff. In just two plus innings, he walked six. SIX! And Tracy leaves
him in until he gives up a 2-run homer and the game is out of reach.
Tracy will probably say something about wanting to "build up
his confidence" or some bullshit like that, but a manager's
job is to win games, not baby his millionaires. The Dodgers ended
up losing 12-4, but if you prevent the Reds from getting eight early
on, you never know how the game would change. On a brighter note,
Paul Shuey seems to have fit in quickly, pitching a very sketchy
2/3 of an inning, allowing a run and loading the bases before departing.
Schmuck.
The
Dodgers lost 3-1 to the Giants on Sunday, but L.A. has reason to
celebrate: Terry Mulholland—and his 7.31 ERA— was traded
to Cleveland. This can mean only one thing: there's a general manager
out there who's dumber than Dan Evans. Mulholland will probably
be used by the Indians to direct traffic outside the stadium, but
nonetheless, that piece of shit is gone. For a day at least, the
blues have been lifted. Along with Mulholland, the Indians received
two minor league pitchers from the Dodgers, who must have entirely
depleted their already-thin minor league pitching staff by now.
Fuck it, though... we got rid of Mulholland. Give Cleveland the
entire Double-A team if you have to. As long as Mulholland is gone,
it's a good deal. What's more, the Dodgers actually got something
in return. An ice cream sandwich would have been fair, but the Indians
went a step further and traded reliever Paul Shuey to the Dodgers.
Even though Shuey's postseason experience won't matter since the
Dodgers won't make it that far, he's a decent addition to the pen.
Whether the acquisition of Tyler Houston helps the team remains
to be seen, but it does seem to have lit a fire under Adrian Beltre's
ass. In the two games since Houston joined the team, Beltre is 7-for-9
with five RBIs. He's done this before, however, so let's just wait
a couple games before saying he's out of his slump and declaring
him the third baseman everyone thought he could be. Which brings
up a point. Memo to all announcers: if a guy is 2-for-30 and hits
a home run, HE'S NOT OUT OF HIS SLUMP. Memo to Fox: Sticking a mic
on the 85-year-old Giants ball girl was really interesting. Maybe
next time you can mic the hot dog vendor. Or even better, how about
an usher's ass hole?
It's small and white. It doesn't move very fast. And it's just 90
feet from first base. Yet, the Dodgers couldn't get there on Wednesday
afternoon. Bobby Jones—a guy who lost nineteen games last season—completely
shut the Dodgers down, not allowing anyone to reach second base.
The Dodgers managed a measly five hits, and in losing 8-0, continued
their rapid descent towards the NL West basement. Kaz Ishii pitched
six, allowing just two runs, but as Dodger relievers do, Guillermo
Mota let the game get away in the 7th. Mota faced just four batters,
allowing two walks and two home runs. No pitching. No hitting. No
defense. A fun team to watch.
A day after picking Jolbert Cabrera out of a trash can in downtown
Cleveland, Dan Evans went searching through a dumpster in Milwaukee
and came out with Tyler Houston. An infielder and career .267 hitter,
Houston does pretty much nothing to improve the Dodgers. And as
if the Dodger minor league system wasn't weak enough, Evans gave
the Brewers two young pitchers in exchange for Houston. This is
exactly why the Dodgers continually find themselves with a shitload
of over-the-hill journeyman (Marquis Grissom, Terry Mulholland,
Tom Goodwin, etc.) but a lack of talent in the minors. Is there
anyone in the organization keeping an eye on all these "senior
advisors" that the team hired before the season? Joey
Amalfitano, Bill Bavasi, John Boles, Terry Collins... are these
assholes doing ANYTHING? Probably at strip clubs in Vegas.
Odalis Perez lost for the 4th time in five starts, and the lowly
Padres beat the Dodgers on Monday, 5-2. Perez continued his downhill
slide since his all-star selection earlier in the month. On Monday,
he not only got pounded around by a last place team, but appeared
stupid as well, failing to cover first on a grounder to the right
side. Dave Hansen didn't help matters, committing two errors at
third. Maybe the time has come to just give up on having a third
baseman. Add an extra guy in the outfield instead. Bocachica in
left-center will surely do more good than Beltre or Hansen at third.
For the second time in three days, Tom Goodwin beat the Dodgers
with a late-inning hit. After knocking home the winning run in the
12th inning on Friday, Goodwin—who is still on the Dodgers'
goddamn payroll—homered off Giovanni Carrara in the 9th inning
Sunday, propelling the Giants to a 6-4 win. While it would be nice
to break Tom Goodwin's fucking legs considering that he has about
7 home runs in 8,000 career at-bats, let's focus on the real problem:
the fact that Giovanni Carrara was still in the game. Three innings
is simply too much for a mediocre reliever who pitched two innings
earlier in the series. Why was he left in? Simple answer: You've
got two old pieces of crap clogging the goddamn roster. Until they're
released, you're going to have three guys who are overworked. Hey
Dan Evans, time to wake up. Put on your bunny slippers. Pick up
the phone. Make some friggin' calls.
DodgerBlues.com is out of commission for 10 days, and look what
happens. Ten days, nine losses. Beautiful. FINALLY, the Dodgers
that we all know and love. FINALLY, the piece of shit team that
we all thought they were. FINALLY, Dan Evans and Jim Tracy are sweating.
And FINALLY, we have something worth talking about on this website.
The bad news: this ship is steered solo, and I'm taking off for
10 days. The good news: Terry Mulholland can suck all he wants the
next week and a half, and this web site won't bash the hell out
of him. Thankfully, however, the message board will always be up.
Please make me proud. 
After a suprising first-half run, the Dodgers wrapped things up
on Sunday with a 12-6 loss to the Cardinals. After coming back from
an early four run deficit to take the lead in the 3rd, Omar Daal—and
two Dodger relievers— let the game slip away. For the second
night in a row, Giovanni Carrara allowed a home run to the first
batter he faced, and it's becoming pretty clear that he just simply
blows. Speaking of poo, Terry Mulholland allowed three runs in two
innings, and raised his ERA to 9.13. It's FAR too late in the season
to have an ERA even close to that. If you can't even bring him in
to eat up innings in a blowout, he's completely fucking useless.
The fact that he's still taking up a spot on the roster is insane.
It's not even worth taking the time to discuss Omar Daal, who gave
up eight runs in just over three innings. With the exception of
a fluke year in '99, Daal has ALWAYS sucked. Why should anyone be
surprised when he gets lit up for eight runs in three innings?
For the second time in a week the Dodgers have lost two in a row,
and things are beginning to look ugly. Well, not quite as ugly as
Rosie, but scary nonetheless. While the team's problem on Wednesday
in Arizona was getting guys on base, their difficulty Thursday in
St. Louis was scoring them. Despite eleven hits, the Dodgers left
nine guys on base, including the tying run on third base in the
ninth. By the way, will someone please show Ishii where home plate
is? And the barber shop. 
Apparently the Dodgers left their brooms with Jim Tracy's wife.
Having a chance to sweep the Diamondbacks in their home park, the
Dodgers instead blew an eighth inning lead and lost 5-3. After scoring
three runs early, the Dodgers managed only two hits over the final
six innings, and Eric Gagne blew his second save. Fucking Diamondback
fans. May they all be pricked in the face by flying cacti. And may
Craig Counsell be struck by lightning the next time he stands at
the plate and twists around like a goddamn retard.